Many astrological cookbooks treat the Moon – Venus aspect as very congenial...just excellent. I've read somewhere, though I can't remember where, that this is the 'milk and cookie' aspect. Ironically, this may not be too far from the truth, at least for the women with this aspect. As someone who has Venus conjunct Jupiter and the Moon, I not only have professional experience working with others with the Moon and Venus in aspect, but also dramatic personal experience. The Moon - Venus aspect has a distinctively darker side that is rarely mentioned; thus, my interest in bringing more attention to how this aspect can function in a harmful - yet Soul-evolving - way than what has so (too) often been written. Please be aware that aspects taken out of context of the whole chart can be misleading; despite this potential, it is often useful to examine each individual piece of the puzzle first before integrating the entire chart. This look at the Moon & Venus in aspect is an exercise in examining just one small piece of a very complicated and intriguing puzzle - that of an individual Soul and what is represented in his or her natal chart. Schedule a consultation with me - I specialize in relationship (including family relationships) and evolutionary/karmic astrology
The poisoned apple and the sleeping death brought to us so vividly in the story of Snow White can be viewed as an analogy to the Moon (Sleep, Dream-world, Unconscious) and Venus (the Apple has long been associated with Venus and the feminine, love, fertility) in aspect.
Biting the Apple (a Mars action – penetration) leads to a deeper understanding and awakening of womanhood or the feminine, but one must experience ‘love’s first kiss’ in order to be truly initiated.
The Moon – Venus aspect can become ‘poisoned’ and painful at adolescence. The first love is a rite of passage for these individuals and often, our first love is our parent of the opposite sex. Yet, as the Moon-Venus individual blossoms into womanhood, she may be suddenly thrust away from her father or shamed (by her mother or other female role model) for expressing her love and affection in a natural way.
A simple hug or kiss can turn into the ‘poisoned apple’ (tainted love) without warning or understanding. The initiation (recognition that one is changing – becoming a woman, becoming fertile) can feel like the death of her relationship with her father…and her mother.
Mother as the Wicked Queen (or evil witch)
The Moon-Venus individual’s Mother (or other mother figure) may feel uncomfortable with her daughter’s blush of adolescent beauty. She may feel that she is in decline and her own concern of her loss of beauty (Venus) through aging is amplified by her confrontation with the Moon-Venus child’s innocent erotic power. When she looks in her magic mirror, the mother is no longer the fairest in the land. If the mother is unable to embrace the beauty in wisdom (the apple) of her approaching Hecate phase, she will – consciously or unconsciously – begin poisoning her daughter psychologically with mixed messages and signals.
The mother and daughter will find themselves in competition with one another, and while the Mother may not admit to her feelings of jealousy (and sometimes hatred), the Moon-Venus child will sense on a very deep level that she is being rejected by her mother and that now that she is entering her Selene phase, her father is off-limits. (1)
For a child who likely grew up being loved, touched, and often stroked by her parents, the lack of touch and rejection can be devastating. (2)
In the Disney version the Wicked Queen is Snow White’s Stepmother but in the original Grimm version of 1812, Snow White’s own mother was the one who grew to hate her due to her blossoming beauty.
“Now Snow-White grew up, and when she was seven years old, she was so beautiful, that she surpassed even the queen herself. Now when the queen asked her mirror:
Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
Who in this land is fairest of all? The mirror said:
You, my queen, are fair; it is true.
But Little Snow-White is still
A thousand times fairer than you.
When the queen heard the mirror say this, she became pale with envy, and from that hour on, she hated Snow-White. Whenever she looked at her, she thought that Snow-White was to blame that she was no longer the most beautiful woman in the world. This turned her heart around. Her jealousy gave her no peace.” (3)
The very nature of the poison is a paradox. When the Moon-Venus person bites into the apple, she (or he) is often very used to receiving apples (love and affection) from her parents or, in very difficult circumstances, from others in her life. The apple presented at adolescence, however, though bright, shiny, and juicy (as always) is tainted – permeated with poison. The poison lies under the skin of the apple, deep in the flesh, and one must bite (penetrate) the skin in order to be poisoned. This particular poison creates a ‘sleeping death’ within the Moon-Venus person, which may manifest as a withdrawal from others and downplaying her natural erotic beauty due to a sense of rejection, betrayal, and fear of becoming too beautiful and thus invoking Mother’s destruction or abandonment.
This withdrawal into oneself is very much like the poison…the pain lies deep under the flesh and one may not be aware of the ‘sleeping death’ until a future love partner penetrates and awakens the Moon-Venus individual with a lover’s kiss. The Moon-Venus person may be attracted to someone like her father or the complete opposite, depending on other factors in her chart. She needs someone of emotional depth but it may take several failed or difficult relationships until she is ready for him (or her).
Mother’s source of poison is typically psychological and it can be extremely difficult to understand how treacherous it is as it is often buried within ‘motherly’ type comments and behavior patterns. For instance, the mother may sabotage by giving food instead of affection or making comments on the daughter’s figure, attractions, or sexuality. She may poison her with negative ideas surrounding the female body and make threats regarding sexual behavior. Some may plant very negative seeds concerning childbirth (to frighten the girl away from exploring sexually and attracting male attention) that create a fear of having children. In very negative situations, she may shame her daughter when she is alone with the father or touches or kisses him – “aren’t you too old for that? What are you doing in there with him?”
The Moon-Venus person is confused as to the mixed messages regarding becoming a woman, particularly the duality of the feminine. Is one a mother/nurturer (Moon) or a seductress (Venus)? If she identifies too closely with the Moon, she may become a matronly type and shun her sexuality (sex only for procreation. Lights out, missionary style). If she identifies too closely with Venus, she can become promiscuous, exceptionally vain, and use men for what they can give her (sensual pleasure, gifts, ego-strokes). Many women with Moon-Venus struggle with weight problems. When the Moon-Venus nature isn’t nurtured with touch, love, and attention, she turns to addictive behaviors…with Venus strong, this often means sensual gratification through comfort foods. If the Mother/female figures in her life nurtured with food, struggled with weight themselves, and/or gave negative messages about the Moon-Venus body, this is more likely to be the case. If the Moon-Venus loves the mother very much, she will do anything to keep from losing her love and affection when young – this includes gaining weight, especially if the Mother is slender or much focused on maintaining a low weight. In this manner, the Moon-Venus won’t be as great as a threat to the Mother (this is the view developed due to the messages sent from the Mother). If there is a love-hate relationship, the Moon-Venus person may stuff down feelings or satisfy emotional needs with food. Promiscuity is also possible if Moon-Venus doesn’t feel attractive or desirable due to messages received growing up. The Moon-Venus individual NEEDS physical sensation, sensuality, and touch. If the only way to get the attention one craves is through sex, the Moon-Venus person may have many partners because she is a very attractive, erotic lover…it is only when she learns to value her own femininity and she is able to begin self-nurturing behaviors that she may be strong enough within her own being to enter into a more stable love relationship. However, if the Moon is the stronger influence (in other words, Mother is very powerful within her psyche), the Moon-Venus person is more likely to marry very young and begin having children. She may avoid sex unless it is for procreation. These women may find themselves putting on an amazing amount of weight with each pregnancy and never losing it. She may seek touch from her children rather than her husband/partner. Her mother is likely to be very involved with her children and may hover over her and her family like a shadow.
Awakening to Beauty
Once the Moon-Venus person enters a romantic connection that helps sever the bond with the Mother (which can be quite difficult with this configuration) and feels comfortable enough to explore her own sexuality, she can begin to recover her feminine power. She gains clarity regarding her relationship with her mother (and father). As the poison seeps out, intense knowledge of the Self can be gained…without the poison, the Moon-Venus person may never experience the depth of emotion he or she is capable of. In the best case scenario, she is more refined in character and thus more intrinsically beautiful. Her beauty now runs deep on a Soul level.
Without the poison and the painful experiences in her adolescent years, the Moon-Venus individual’s beauty may remain only skin deep. The poison is both the source of the ‘sleeping death’ and the catalyst for deeper self-awareness. While she may worry about growing old and entering her own Hecate phase, she cherishes her inner beauty, her wisdom, and her natural attractiveness enough to not feel threatened by her own daughter’s youth and beauty.
There can be a sense of confusion within the male psyche due to mixed signals he receives from his mother as to whether he should view her as the nurturing mother or the erotic lover. She may make him her ‘little man;’ perhaps as a replacement for a missing husband or an unhappy marriage or partnership. She may give her son all of the sensual strokes and comforting he needs, perhaps to feed her own sensual needs. This is not to be taken in a truly sexual manner – though that is also possible. Sensual touch does not necessarily mean sexual. A mother may stroke her child’s face or hair, give a back rub, or tuck him into bed and kiss him goodnight without any sexual thought or intent. However, beneath her loving touches is an erotic urge and need that may be going unfulfilled. Children are very intuitive and vulnerable and the young boy may feel responsible toward meeting his mother’s needs, even though he does not fully understand what it is she actually needs.
Another potential experience for men with Moon-Venus in their chart is the ‘hands-off’ mother. This type of experience can be even more painful than the male experience of trying to make the mother happy and meet her unknown sensual needs (though it is impossible as what she needs is a male lover, that which her son cannot fulfill). This is a more poisonous type of relationship because there is an underlying ‘incestuous’ feel in the ‘hands-off’ type of mother. She may be aware of erotic longings toward her son and this may be why she refuses to touch him. These are generally karmic relationships and they may have been lovers in a previous life, which only adds to the confusion for the child (and mother).
The complications for a Moon-Venus man in his future love relationships generally center on his not knowing whether he wants a mother or a lover type for a partner. He may fluctuate between the two types, unable to make up his mind. He may also tend to choose the lover only to try to turn her into a mother-figure as the relationship progresses. His poison is the confusion he carries within until he develops deeper self-awareness, which will most likely occur through difficult adult relationships. He may find that his most remarkable and healing relationship will be with a woman who shares a Moon-Venus aspect, but only if she has already awakened to Beauty.
Moon & Venus Aspects
The Conjunction, opposition, quincunx, sesquiquadrate, square, & semisquare are difficult but the tension will ensure that the Moon-Venus individual continues to work to find solutions and healing – their pain is too intense not to confront it.
The ‘easy’ aspects such as the trine, sextile, semi-sextile, quintile, and biquintile may prove to be more challenging if the Moon-Venus person fails to recognize there is a problem or that healing is needed. They may view the behavior as typical or ‘normal.’
Dryer, Ronnie Gale. Venus: The Evolution of the Goddess and Her Planet. London, England: Aquarian Press, 1994.
Idemon, Richard. Through The Looking Glass: A Search for the Self in the Mirror of Relationships. Seminars in Psychological Astrology, Volume 5. York Beach, Maine: Samuel Weiser, Inc. 1992.
Moore, Thomas. The Soul of Sex: Cultivating Life as an Act of Love. New York, New York: Harper-Collins, 1998.
Script-o-Rama. [Online] http://www.script-o-rama.com/movie_scripts/s/snow-white-and-the-seven-dwarves-script.html.
1) The three phases of the Triple Goddess are Artemis/Diana (the young maiden; virgin); Selene/Luna (the mature, fertile woman); Hecate (wise old woman).
2) Touch is one of the strongest ways to nurture a Moon-Venus person. They need physical, sensual, tactile sensation to feel loved. This natural need is usually fulfilled when the Moon-Venus person is a child as they are typically very loving and beautiful…they attract a lot of interest and people want to hug and touch them due to their beauty.
3) Source: http://www.pitt.edu/~dash/type0709.html#snowwhite